Neil and David, D-Wade and Gabrielle, Brad and Angelina; other than all being celebrities, these lovely couples have one more thing in common — they’ve all recently gotten married. And, so have 10 of my Facebook friends.
Despite all my preparations leading up to graduation, I must have missed the part about walking across the stage and immediately down the aisle. According to my Facebook newsfeed, I’m behind schedule with the whole marriage and kids timeline set forth by some unknown being. But, apparently unlike so many others out there, I am nowhere near ready to take the plunge.
Don’t get me wrong, I think love and weddings and all that shit are wonderful. If you’ve been one of the lucky few to meet your soulmate before you’ve reached the age of 30, then kudos to you. I have not been so fortunate nor would I want to be. I would want to wait until I had all my shit together before I started sharing my life with another human being for the rest of my life.
Statistically speaking, I’m among those in the norm (that’s a first). In 2013, the marriage rate was measured at an all-time low with 31 out of every 1000 women tying the knot, according to an article in the Huffington Post. Additionally, the average age of women getting married is on the rise too; 27 was the magic number in 2013 and it seems to only be getting higher.
So, if statistics are on my side, why are so many of my friends on the other?
It could be that many people our age have found it difficult to imagine a successful marriage because so many of the marriages we’ve seen growing up have ended in divorce. It could also be that our idea of what a family is or should be has changed over the years. We are exposed to so many different forms of entertainment showing us that a happy family can exist without the “Leave It to Beaver” style of familial dynamics. We have experienced so much diversity in our short lives that it may be affecting the way we view marriage and family.
Via: jokideo.com
And, despite falling marriage rates, the birth rates among twenty-somethings seem to be holding steady. According to the “Knot Yet” report, the median age of a woman’s first birth is around 25, but the median age of first marriage is around 26. I may not be the best at math, but from these statistics it seems that many people are postponing marriage until after having children or maybe even forever.
For me, family isn’t about finding the person you’re meant to marry and starting a life with them. It may be a part of the picture I’ve created for myself, but it will never be the whole thing. Good for all of those young couples finding love and happiness before real grown-up jobs, but for me, waiting works.
So, get down with your married selves, and don’t worry about the rest of us. You’ll get annoyed with our status updates about finding the loves of our lives soon enough.
Featured photo courtesy of: huffingtonpost.com
