Everyone is quick to tell you that college is “the best years of your life,” but it seems that no one is willing to tell you that it can be scary as fuck.
You get ripped from the comfort of Mom’s bosom with no guide except the bullshit you watched on MTV and life lessons you learned at the bus stop and now you’re supposed to figure out who you are, who you want to be and what you want to do with the rest of your life. It’s exhilarating and liberating and tiring and frightening all at the same time. It’s college and you are not alone.
The GainesvilleScene series “College Fears” aims to delve into these unspoken fears. You might laugh, you might cry, hell, you might even realize we feel the same way about shit that you do.
Sex in College
While there might be some truth in “we ain’t nothing but mammals,” there’s tremendous benefit in overcoming your primal instincts and using some discretion. From the hormonal cocktail sex creates in the brain to the unwanted emotional aftermath, it’s a lot harder than you think to keep things as “just sex.” Develop boundaries, know your limits and maintain a little mystery. Your self-esteem, reputation and sexual health will thank you.
Ladies do not take kindly to being called “slampieces.” Also, steer clear of “boner sleeve.”
If someone you’re having sex with doesn’t respect you, stop having sex with them. And as a general rule, if you see someone you’ve boned somewhere, say hi to them. An angel loses its wings every time someone ignores an old hookup. Like it or not, once you’ve been inside someone or vice-versa, you have a connection with them for the rest of your life. So keep that in mind when you’re considering banging the guy who always gives you free guac at Chipotle. And use condoms. For the love of God.
Via: hercampus.com
Stay true to who you are. Not everyone is having sex in college, contrary to popular belief, and if you’re not ready to do so, don’t just do it to get it over with. There have been people before you who have done that and many of them wish they waited for the right time or the right person before jumping into sex.
There is no magic formula for knowing when it’s a good time to have sex and when it’s not. You just need to feel it. Don’t worry so much about waiting an arbitrary amount of time before having sex with someone new. If you feel it, do it.
Be safe. Yes, wear condoms, use birth control, but being safe happens in other ways, as well. Don’t practice risky behavior that could come back to haunt you later on in life. A sexy photo or amateur video made on Photo Booth may seem like a good idea now, but what about when it’s found a pre-interview Google search for your first real post-grad job offer. Have your fun, but don’t be dumb.
Via: teed.nl.com
Did you actually think you’d be able to get hard after taking 35 mg of Adderall? LOL. My condolences to your deflated penis and your girlfriend.
Sex doesn’t have to mean commitment. It can, but it’s not necessary. Just make sure that both parties understand and feel the same way about the sex situation. If one person thinks you’re being exclusive when you’re not, it could lead to some pretty awkward predicaments.
If the condom rips, be a gentleman and go buy Plan B.
Experiment. College is a time of learning not only in classes, but also in life. Now is the time to find out what you like and dislike…in bed. High school sex is fast, simple and very to-the-point. In college, sex is about exploring who you are between the sheets. Don’t be afraid to try new things because what you actually like may surprise you.
Via: writtalin
Nutella is good on fruit, bread, spoons and a million other things. Not so good on genitals.
Don’t let your roommate judge you because she has a long-distance boyfriend, but you sleep in a different boy’s bed three times a week. Don’t let boys judge you if you want a ride to your 9:30 am lab the next day. Don’t judge yourself, most of all, as long as you’re doing something that makes you happy. Do whatever and whomever you want. Ten years from now you’re going to have a mortgage. You’re going to be sleeping next to the same person every night. He probably won’t be 6’4” like the dumb football player from freshman year Good Life that you shack with on occasion, so enjoy those overinflated biceps while you can.
Grab your compass and go find your partner’s G-Spot.
Sex in college is about experimentation, whether that be experiencing different people or experiencing new things with the same person. It’s not always going to be amazing, especially if you’re blackout and just spent 7+ hours tailgating in the hot sun, but it definitely doesn’t suck either. So try out new things and learn about yourself and your interests while in college, where nowadays almost anything is socially acceptable.
Make rules for yourself. My rule is, I don’t sleep with anyone the first time I kiss them. Giving yourself limitations is a good way to keep it in your pants and still have fun. No one likes a slut, and no one likes to be called a slut. So, before you sleep with an entire frat’s pledge class, think about how sex rumors spread like STDs at FSU.
The human body is beautiful. Don’t be self-conscious. Skin brushing against skin, lips deeply kissing lips, fingers softly caressing curves. When you’re with someone, be fully present in that moment. Surrender to sensation. Don’t allow yourself to worry about small details, but instead, get lost in them. If you are constantly thinking to yourself, “is this enjoyable? am I doing this right?” you will ruin the experience for everyone. Do what feels natural. Go with the flow. Get into it. Get into feeling YOURSELF. If you do what makes your body feel good, chances are the other person will revel in your pleasure and experience it too.
Give her some notice.
Be careful with the butthole. Since ass-play and ass-eating is the new trend (am I the only one who’s heard that?), make sure you keep that shit clean (pun intended). Also, keep the two entry points exclusive to one another. In this situation, you really don’t want to switch it up. Which brings me to a non-sequitur. Getting down and dirty could lead to an infection.
OTPHJs are never as subtle as you think they are.
All the stars are finally aligning and you’ve got her in bed. She wants it, you want it, it’s on. But when you make your move to get things going, you run into the female equivalent of the Sahara Desert. Don’t freak out, this happens sometimes, no need to take it personally. Also, this isn’t a seatbelt buckle, attempting to jam it in doesn’t help anyone. If you are on the more experienced side, are feeling particularly frisky and trust your counterpart, take a trip downtown. If you’re any good, she will love it (a hair pull is a good indication) and it should solve the problem at hand. If that route is not in play, a dash of water aimed to the correct regions is a solid fail-safe. From there, smooth sailing to Pleasure Town.
Two is company, but three’s a crowd, if ya catch my drift.
A woman’s body is a delicate ecosystem. If she and her partner take care of it, it will remain fresh and pleasant. If it is mistreated, the results will be… you know. Always wash your body — or at least your hands — before getting busy. Know the difference between STDs and yeast infections, UTIs, and BV. Anything can change a woman’s PH balance, and an especially sensitive woman can even get an infection from using the wrong soap. If a woman has recurring infections, it doesn’t mean that she’s a slut. It means that she should take probiotics.
Not all penises will rock your world. Some of them will hook left. Other will hook right. Some will be downright underwhelming. Try not to laugh. That would be a real downer (pun very intended).
Communicate. Learn what you enjoy and voice it proudly. The first time you sleep with someone, they might need a few pointers. By the third time, you two could have the code to unlocking each other’s sweet spots.
Alcohol is such a game changer. It’s a universal standard lowerer. Not just in terms of who you’re willing to bone, but also where, when, why and how. College has taught me to always proceed with caution when positioned in front of a bar or keg.
The next morning is always fair game and nature likes to remind us of this with a little morning wood. If you’re cuddling, believe me, she knows what you’re thinking. Before making a move, remember things aren’t as fast and sloppy as they may have been the night prior, and it’s daylight now, so there is an added element of vulnerability. Adjust your approach accordingly — maybe some gentle caressing, extended make-out session and some foreplay. There’s no better way to start the day (besides MorningScene).
Think we missed any valuable advice or savory lessons about sex in college? Comment below, ya filthy animals.
Featured photo courtesy of: SheKnows
