Two Saturdays ago a Lake Mary resident was mauled by a bear in her driveway after going outside to check on her kids.
“She started pulling me toward the woods,” 44-year-old Terri Frana told WESH-TV. “I just thought, ‘God, please this can’t be the end. It can’t end like this.’”
You’re probably wondering how Frana knew that the creature was a she-bear. The answer—an existential, motherly connection. Why else would the bear allow Frana to survive with mere flesh wounds?
While this might seem like an isolated incident, it’s not. Urban sprawl has plopped residential areas alongside long-established bear territory throughout central Florida. Just last year a black bear was spotted here in Gainesville, on South Main Street.
Gainesville’s proximity to Payne’s Prairie and other conservation land makes our little melting pot a wonderland for black bears, especially in the springtime when young male bears are out trolling for she-bears. This gentrification, coupled with a decreasing fear of humans, has caused an overbearing problem for everyone involved.
Suppose you are walking down University Ave and you see a black bear peering into Otter and Trout, probably looking for some Frankincense for his mother-in-law. This is what you do:
1. Don’t run.
No matter how badly you want to, don’t. The bear will immediately think you are prey and follow suit. He is faster than you. He is also an expert climber, so trees aren’t really an option either.
2. Don’t panic.
Again, if you act like prey, the bear will think you are prey. Don’t be. Keep a cool head.
3. Don’t make eye contact.
Bears are mental as hell. If you look him in the eye, he will perceive you as a threat and you will be finished.
4. Make yourself big and tall. Hold your hands above your head and widen your stance.
If the bear stands up, he is not trying to attack; he is trying to smell and see you and assess the situation. By making yourself seem bigger than you are, you present a more intimidating front.
5. Back away slowly.
Sudden movements are likely to provoke the bear. You do not want the bear to think that you are an easy, docile target.
6. Talk loudly in a deep voice. If you have any metallic objects, slowly retrieve them and clang them together (keys, etc.)
There have been reported cases of bears being scared off by “unnatural” sounds.
7. If you have any foodstuff on you, drop it as you slowly walk away.
At this point, the bear will probably fuck off. They typically are not big fans of humans as far as prey is concerned, and compared to grizzly bears, black bears are considerably timid.
According to Bear.org, only an average of one person is killed by the 750,000 black bears of North America per year. So, if you do happen to encounter one of these beauties in the wild (or in your driveway), respect the bear, but stand your ground. Remember that the bear is likely just as scared as you are.
In the case of Terri Frana, her mistake was most likely turning her back to the bear. Whether the bear took this as a sign of prey or as a mere insult remains to be seen.
Beary, beary interesting…
