Dealbreakers, we all have them. Some more than others, but none of us is perfect.
But I happen to pride myself on not possessing the one deal breaker that would un-seal the proverbial deal for me: Bad grammar.
See, one of my basic requirements when considering the opposite sex is a rudimentary knowledge and understanding of grammar.
“Nooooooo,” I groaned as I scarfed down Mochi.
“What? What happened? What did he say?” my worried female friend probed.
I shook my head sadly, “It’s over. He’s never getting a text back ever.”
She looked puzzled.
Via: 49 First Dates
“He just used ‘aloud’ instead of ‘allowed.”
His fate was sealed.
The world is made up of two kinds of people: those who use the English language correctly, and those who butcher it mercilessly and ignorantly. No matter how impressive your pecs, your GPA, or your job prospects, you will get nowhere with me if you don’t know the rules of grammar.
Unfortunately, as an English major also doing pre-med, I’ve been punished with a low tolerance for science majors’ blasé attitude toward writing and reading. Many STEM majors clutch the stereotype of a nerdy Rainman who has “no head for words.” Because who needs to know how to write in real life anyway, right?
Wrong.
Via: The Telegraph
Content to leave the realm of grammar, punctuation and sentence structure to those who probably will never have writing jobs, they blunder on with their gross abuse of the English language.
I’m sorry, but announcing your new job with Boeing via social media and incorrectly using “your” is not something I would want associated with my name. If I were Boeing and realized you couldn’t interchangeably use “your” and “you’re,” I would rescind the offer.
This, I’m sad to say, is not an example of an isolated event. And it’s not just enthusiastic scientific minds. Too many people are guilty of throwing conventional English grammar rules to the wind.
According to my father, “scientists make the world go round.” In all fairness, he has a PhD in engineering, but I would hope that whoever is supposedly setting the world on its axis and causing it to orbit, would have a solid grasp of grammar.
“Well, I’m just going to make things. I’m a scientist,” is NOT a valid excuse to speak and write like a neanderthal.
Via: Steelers Fever Forum
Let me interrupt this little fantasy. You will have to speak, my friend. In board meetings, leadership trainings and reports to your boss. And you will have to write. Various emails and many memos. There is no scenario where the excuse “I am no good with words” will be accepted by your employer.
Please, at the risk of sounding like a mentally handicapped Pike who never passed Comp I, I would advise you brush up on these handy grammar rules.
1. “Pick a tense and marry it,” as my good friend would say. Don’t cheat on it, be a loving and faithful spouse to that tense. Through sickness and health, you hold onto that tense and only in the most extreme circumstances will divorce from said tense be allowed.
2. Don’t EVER incorrectly use “their,” “they’re” or “there” or “your” and “you’re” or even “than” and “then.” LOOK UP THE RULES IF YOU’RE CONFUSED. (See, how I just gave you an example of the correct usage of “you’re.”) This one is a no-brainer.
Via: Science Daily
3. Just because you think in bullet points doesn’t mean your paragraph should be a collection of bullet points. A paragraph is a collection of thoughts that flow together and make sense, not a bunch of bullet points you strung together.
For the love of God, and the people reading your writing (which has been me on various occasions), please try to follow these rules and prove to people that you are a well-rounded human who can express themselves in an acceptable manner.
To my fellow STEM-major friends, no shade is being thrown your way. However, I would love you even more if you didn’t ask me to proofread things that flagrantly disregard these rules. It’s common sense, but it’s also more than that.
It’s common decency.
Feature photo courtesy of: Oxford University Press
