Your Netflix Picks of the Week

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Searching for a good movie on Netflix Instant is like looking for top shelf liquor at a frat party. You search and search and ask around for way too long and when you finally find a little bit hidden somewhere, you’re ready to ditch the party.

We’ve all been there, and we agree that ain’t nobody got time for all that browsing. So to spare you some time and a lot of agony, we will do the sifting for you and, each week, provide a fresh list of cinematic masterpieces you can find right in your friend’s your Netflix account and watch at a moment’s notice.

Our Netflix Picks of the Week will be the product of eclectic minds coming together to give you the créme de la créme (or what’s made available by the powers that be over at Netflix) of comedies, dramas, independents, documentaries, thinkers and, our very own creation, the stinkers — terrible movies we love to hate. Sometimes we’ll even throw in a good television show.

You’re welcome.

Comedy

“Bachelorette” (2012)

The dark comedy counterpart to the smash hit “Bridesmaids,” “Bachelorette” will have you screaming internally at your insecurities by the time the credits roll.

Kirsten Dunst, Lizzy Caplan and Isla Fisher play high school friends and bridesmaids to bride-to-be Rebel Wilson. Each character has her own unique set of insecurities, which are brought out by their friend’s impending marriage. They collectively deal with their self-esteem issues by throwing themselves into drugs, sex and alcohol the night before Wilson’s wedding, making for one epically long and fucked up night that is sure to make you laugh uncontrollably, as well as experience some schadenfreude.

“Bachelorette” is a hilarious foray into complex female friendships, and it’s a must-see.

Drama

“Blue Valentine” (2010)

Let me preface this by saying: This is not your typical Ryan Gosling performance. This Sundance Film Festival hit starring Gosling and Michelle Williams chronicles growing, and failing, relationship between their characters. “Blue Valentine” hops back and forth through time, shifting between the start of their relationship to the suffering of their marriage. It will bring laughter, sadness, anger and happiness all at once in a matter of seconds, and other times it’ll bring tears to your eyes, or bring you dangerously close. This flim truly answers the question of whether love can grow over time or if time and tough situations are debilitating enough to break a couple. Up until the very end, you’ll debate won’t which half of the couple deserves the happy ending, if at all, leaving you emotionally spent, confused, but enlightened.

Action

“Kill Bill: Vol. 1″ (2003)

It’s a shame that the DVD cover of “Kill Bill: Vol. 1” looks like a soft-core science fiction porno that probably includes two hours of telepathic fellatio. It’s actually the reason I hesitated watching the movie for so long. The cover is Uma Thurman in a yellow jumpsuit, holding a samurai sword in the least intimidating way possible. Even the movie poster for Nicholas Cage’s “Bangkok Dangerous” leaves you with more curiousity.

All of that aside, the first installment of “Kill Bill” is Tarantino working with his main bitch, and that is enough reason for you to watch. Few people can tell a revenge story while forging American culture with Japanese traditions quite like this weirdo can.

Uma only cries a few times, and I promise it’s for damn good reasons. The film is jam-packed with epic battle scenes complemented by the director’s impeccable music selection. The characters are exceedingly memorable, and you get to watch Lucy Liu and Vivica A. Fox be sexy ass cute lil’ ninja hoes and then die.

Independent

“The Dish & The Spoon” (2011)

Most people know Greta Gerwig from her charming comedic roles in movies like “Frances Ha” or “No Strings Attached.” But “The Dish & The Spoon” is a more accurate display of Gerwig’s versatility as an actress as she effortlessly vacillates between anger and kindness in this romantic comedy.

Gerwig plays Rose, a married woman who has run away from her cheating husband. Rose meets a British teenage boy, played by the adorable Olly Alexander (“Enter The Void,” “Skins: Pure”). The two seem like an unlikely pair, but the earnestness and relatability of the two protagonists is heart-warming.

Documentary

“I Am” (2010)

“I Am” is Tom Shadyac’s masterpiece of a documentary. The director of “Ace Ventura,” “The Nutty Professor,” “Liar Liar” and “Bruce Almighty,” he’s probably best known for discovering Jim Carrey, but this documentary is a sharp contrast from the slapstick hilarity he is known for.

It’s a cerebral investigation into human nature that explores implications and impacts of different avenues to a meaningful existence. Much of it is personal as Shadyac explains his own traversal through life, particularly his descent into depression after acquiring his wealth and eventually suffering from post-concussion syndrome.

It is not solely personal, though. The film follows Shadyac as he interviews a wide array of scientists, religious leaders, environmentalists and philosophers, all in an attempt to understand human nature, particularly what he refers to as the “world’s ever-growing addiction to materialism.”

In spite of its subject matter, the film is magnificently positive and forces one to re-evaluate what constitutes bliss and significance.

Thinker

“Enter The Void” (2009)

“Enter the Void” is a psychedelic drama film directed by Argentinian filmmaker Gaspar Noe. For those who have seen “Drive” or “Only God Forgives,” think of Noe as the poor man’s Nicholas Winding Refn.

This film is not for people who value substance over style. This film is stylized with beautiful neon graphics but lacks any semblance of conventional dialogue and story-telling. And for those who are impatient, you might be put off by the somewhat tedious storyline. Despite these aspects, it still proves to be a beautiful film.

The premise involves Oscar, an American in living in Tokyo, and his experiences involving drugs. When he is suddenly shot, we relive his life in segments.

This movie was recommended me to me under the condition that I view it under the influence of drugs. I opted to watch it (sober) recently and really enjoyed it.

Stinker

“Jackass: The Movie” (2002)

If you’re at all familiar with the antics of comedian/daredevils/psychos Bam Margera, Johnny Knoxville, Steve-O or Ryan Dunn, you know what you’re getting yourself into when you click “play” for “Jackass: The Movie.” This 84-minutelong compilation of reckless hijinks won’t enhance your intellect, but it’ll make you simultaneously laugh and grimace as this group of idiots runs around pulling stunts.

The movie was heavily edited in order to be allowed in theaters, and even the unrated cut had to to be modified so as to not implicate producers with criminal charges such as reckless homicide.

Regardless of how many Razzies it won or how shitty many reviews were, “Jackass: The Movie” is a cinematic treasure because it chronicles stupidity carried out on a level of such aggression and fearlessness that it merits applause. Not even Roger Ebert could condemn it, giving the movie his thumbs-up seal of approval.

If you’ve ever wondered what the human reaction to, say, eating a urine sno-cone is, this is the movie for you.

But seriously, don’t try any of this at home.

Classic

“Annie Hall” (1977)

Every romantic comedy in existence owes credit to “Annie Hall.” It isn’t regarded as a classic simply because it is a good movie, but because it is a quintessentially accurate depiction of the beginning and end of romantic relationships.

Woody Allen wrote, directed and starred in the film as Alvy Singer. He basically plays himself in this as a neurotic, quirky, yet lovable, entertainer. He meets Annie, played by Diane Keaton, and the two fall in love. Then they fall out of love. Then they fall in love again. Then they break up.

I’m not exaggerating when I say I’ve seen this movie close to 50 times. Each time I watch it, I catch a new reference or joke or subtle hint. If you’re going to watch any movie today, let it be this one.

TV Show

“The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret” (2010-2012)

If you couldn’t get enough Tobias Funke in “Arrested Development,” then “The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret” should be the next show to watch on your list. David Cross stars as the titular character, accidentally landing a job as the head of an energy drink company’s overseas department. I’ll admit, it took a couple of episodes to really let the show sink in, but after a while I couldn’t help but look as Cross’s character naively makes an absolute buffoon of himself across the pond while attempting to sell liquid sludge. Between getting himself involved in terrorist plots, becoming a national pariah and regularly making undeft moves in pursuit of romance with a woman, Todd Margaret is the special ingredient for train wreck comedy gold.

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