As Americans, we’ve all had those passive aggressive end-of-dinner arguments over how much to tip the server. Twenty percent? Fifteen percent? Ten percent?
No, you don’t want to look like an asshole. Do you want your server to starve tonight? We tip because it’s customary, even though it’s not a legal obligation. However, your date might not go home with you if you don’t leave a bit of cash. Most countries don’t tip, which is why many tourists in America may get a glimpse of the stink-eye from their server on the way out of the restaurant.
Why is America so pro-tipping? Many people say, “In America, we tip our servers because it’s an incentive for good service!” But that’s not the case. In fact, we tip because we feel guilty that someone has to wait on us, and we rarely change how much we tip based on the quality of service. We normally just tip based on how much our meal cost. So, our tip is going to be much larger on a $300 bill than a $30 one, even if our service was the same.
Where and when we tip can also be confusing. Why don’t we tip the chef cooking over the steaming stove or our dentist for cleaning our grimy teeth?
We’re so accustomed to the system in place that we rarely stop and to think why don’t restaurants (and other typical tipping services) just pay their workers a living wage? As customers, we’re somehow inclined to do the owner’s job, which in turn doesn’t benefit us or our servers.

Via: Unsplash
On top of all the nonsense tipping causes, tipping also is subject to racism and sexism. On average, females get larger tips than males, and white servers get tipped more than black servers. In modern times, we’re pushing for more equality all around, and by making sure each server gets paid a fair wage, we would be one small step closer to our goal.
Some American restaurants are already on-board the no-tipping train. For example, Sushi Yasuda in NYC decided to follow Japanese customs and ban tipping. Time even did an article of 21 restaurants that don’t allow tipping, and all their servers are doing fine.
In reality, this custom isn’t going to flip anytime soon. Everyone would have to stop tipping on cue in order for the American restaurant industry to make any changes. And we would also have to deal with raising the minimum wage in general (we all know how that argument goes.) You could just stop tipping altogether, but your servers aren’t going to take it lightly (and you going solo isn’t going to make a big change).
The first step is to understand why other countries keep laughing at us. The second is to actively inform other Americans the truth behind tipping and get everyone (servers, business owners, customers and the government) on the same tab.
Until then, we’re just going to have to keep bringing our calculators to the dinner table.
Featured photo courtesy of: Unsplash