Trapped in a High-Waisted Hell

This is a guest post from TampaBayScene’s Seannon Nichols.

As the summer months approach, Tampa becomes ground zero for stripping out of that oh-so comfy sweater and legging and boot combination and swapping them for the high-waisted shorts and tanks that are haute couture this year.

Now I personally don’t understand the need to have shorts wedged so high in between my legs that people are asking me for rides across the Sahara, but I’m no fashion expert either. However, I do feel that as a concerned citizen, with the gift of sight, that it is my obligation to say this: Ladies, I understand wanting to be in style, but showing camel toe in the front and ass cheeks in the back is not acceptable.

I don’t care how skinny or plus sized you happen to be, letting it all hang out is not a positive reaction to the summer heat. If you are really that hot might I suggest a spray bottle with a fan? Busch Gardens, conveniently located right here in Tampa, provides those very same spray bottles when it’s hot, not pieces of jean that give the same appearance as a thong would.

For those who would argue that it’s cute and men like it and it’s what the style, I want you to ask yourself if those are really important or even worthwhile reasons to be uncomfortable and have people staring at your private parts. Believe me, they are staring. A friend and I sat in a courtyard at the University of Tampa on a day that was about 80 degrees and counted how many asses were sticking out of shorts. In a 15 minute period we saw 25 cases. That’s more than one a minute. This was not the original intention for our outing, but it became obvious that this is a cultural fashion epidemic and it needs to stop, for several reasons.

1.  It’s not cute.
Real men, who value a girl for more than her ass, don’t want it on display for everyone else.

2. Just because something is “in” doesn’t mean you have to succumb to it.
Choose to be different! Have an original idea. Choose to cover yourself. Choose to have some clothes that don’t look like you’re going to need the tweezers from Operation to get them off.

Don’t submit to our societal standards of displaying your physical assets for all to see. Splitting yourself in two for an extended period of time isn’t worth all the admiration and attention in the world. High-waisted shorts are made to be worn by women who are the Twiggys of the world and the majority of women that wear them are not. Most girls pull them on to cover up whatever size stomach or pooch they think it’s hiding, not realizing (or not caring) it is unearthing ass cheeks and dimpled thighs.

Ladies, if you think you look good and don’t care about these things more power to you! Go on with your bad self! But know that it’s not a requirement for life. Just because it buttons and you can pull it up doesn’t mean it fits. Wear things that are comfortable and flattering. It’s never so hot that we need to expose ourselves this much.

Please enjoy these musings from a plus sized girl, who sweats her ass off covering herself up in this hot ass climate.

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