Beaty Towers East to Be Converted to All Red Parking Garage

• Tweet

• Tweet

You heard that right, folks.

After many years of collecting tears and listening to the endless rants from Gators far and wide, Transportation and Parking Services released in a press release on Thursday night that it would finally add a new parking garage on campus.

The garage will replace Beaty Towers East, a freshman dorm known for its elevator parties and luxury-apartment-style feel, in order to grant the wishes of the students.

The garage will be four stories and will have an underground level. It will also be an all red parking zone, which will give students who have completed less than 50 hours and live on campus a chance to park.

Demolition of Beaty Towers East will take place over the summer months when most of the freshman will be home preparing themselves –and their livers— for the next three years to come. There will be a demolition celebration on April 20. The celebration will include free pizza and sushi along with a speech from President Fuchs about the great steps UF is taking to listen to the needs of the youth. (He’s like our own Bernie, guys!)

The money for the parking garage will be funded through the Student Wish and Plea Grant that was started back in 1905 by a student who wishes to remain anonymous for social reasons. Additional funds will be provided by a fundraiser that will be held at Midtown.

So mark your calendars, and don’t forget….

April Fools.

 

---