As “free-spirited” and “carefree” as I sometimes filter myself to appear, I’ve always been somewhat straight-edged in my daily routine. While the majority of my weekdays have been comprised of school, work and schoolwork, they always end with a nightly attempt to outrun an internally saturated slew of liquor and late-night pizza via treadmill. With a gender-incompatible appetite and a metabolic rate comparable to that of Peter Griffin, the gym is the only reason I am not the obese subject of some obscure TLC show or working as a carnie under the “World’s Fattest Woman” stage name.
Since freshman year, running has been my preferred method of exercise. I’ve improved my endurance, established my pacing and have been conned into spending absurd amounts of money on “proper footwear”. I even thought about running a half-marathon one time. However, like so many others, the repetition and stagnancy of the treadmill and my general unwillingness to hit the stadium lead to an inevitable aerobic plateau. What I once considered a goal-oriented, enjoyable form of cardio slowly transformed into a daunting hour of self-imposed pressure. In my opinion, the marketing team at Nike don’t understand that the slogan “Just Do It” is a lot more appealing on the front of a neon t-shirt than as a realistic life mantra.
My body was craving something different and I responded by delving into the Rec Sports catalog of group fitness classes. All I can say is what a fucking gold mine. As UF students, we have access to a full schedule of everything from Zumba to exclusive series like “Partners Yoga” all at zero cost. After sampling my fair share of options, I’ve managed to narrow down my sweatiest, heart rate quickening and most Zen picks.
Vinyasa Yoga
As a novice yogi, nothing is worse than competing with the spiritual contortionists capable of pretzeling their bodies for seventy-five minutes like they are auditioning for Cirque Du Soleil. While I am aware that a competitive edge won’t exactly help me “find my center”, I can’t help but feel the sting of inferiority whenever I have to retreat to child’s pose while Lululemon-clad bitches invert their legs over their heads. Vinyasa takes all of the white-girl rivalry out of yoga. This practice focuses primarily upon deep, synchronized breathing, posture and fluidity over intricacy and stagnancy. It supports internal focus and removes the pressure of perfecting each pose. Those suffering from daily stress and seeking to dip their toes into the somewhat intimidating realm of yoga can find mental tranquility via Vinyasa at both the Student Rec Center and Southwest throughout each week.
Power Yoga
After you’ve studied your asanas, perfected Pigeon and learned what exactly the fuck a chakra is, you might take your hand at Power Yoga. Compared to other styles, its no walk in the park. For me, it was a disgustingly sweat-soaked sprint in the park, at least compared to the other practices that I’ve tried. While breathing and posture are no doubt emphasized, Power Yoga relies heavily upon rapid changes in movement and core engagement through difficult stability poses. If you’re partial to the “mind” and “spirit” principles of yoga over the “body” one, I’d avoid this one. The postures are more advanced, the class is lengthy and honestly, it feels a lot more like an hour of cardio than a relaxing, mindful experience.
Core (30)
Every method of exercise, personal trainer, or DVD fitness star, in one way or another, suggests that you “engage your core”. Few, however, go through the motions of defining exactly what that entails. When day-old mascara is seeping into my tear-filled eyeballs in the middle of a run, do you really think I am concerned about “sucking it in”? Please. Truth be told, abdominal strength is something of a wishful figment to me and for most of my life, cutting back on bagel bites was as close as I came to achieving core definition. Whether you think a crunch is just a sound your mouth makes are you destroy a bag BBQ Lays or the Insanity box set is your Bible, this class will leave you with a sore core. Even though the session lasts a mere half-hour, the instructor typically tackles all major muscle groups in the abdominal region. From static planking to rapid sets of Russian twists, core stability and resilience are key and will definitely leave your mid-section burning.
Interval Training
This category of exercise has been one of the trendiest health movements in recent years, and with good reason. The premise is to fuse periods of low-impact activity with bursts of maximum-effort exertion, unconventionally and beneficially twisting classic cardio. By raising and lowering the heart’s rate, one can improve endurance, lose fat, and quickly build lean muscle in its place. UF’s class takes full advantage of equipment like resistance bands, medicine balls, kettle bells, and free-weights to help create an effective and engaging hour of intensity.
Kickboxing
After just one class, I understood why kickboxing is the preferred method of cardio for Victoria’s Secret angels and thigh-gapped A-Listers. This Wednesday evening hour of exercise is a personal favorite of mine simply for the fact that it is non-stop. Danielle is one of the most talented student-trainers I’ve ever learned from. Each week she hooks it up with a new and different workout than the previous class. Typically, she combines high-intensity P90X circuits with your standard hooks and kick to create a continuous hour of rapid cardio. Truth be told, I’m about as uncoordinated as they come and find my robotic movements to be lead-footed in comparison to the rest of the class. However, it commands speed and stamina over achieving a Rocky-level uppercut, which by my standards, makes for a solid workout.
These instructors, while young, know their shit and provide the simple student with countless opportunities to feel the burn. Venture past the boarders of your elliptically-constrained comfort zone and take advantage of the killer conditioning resources that UF has to offer.
